Tag Archives: marriage

A Sweet Husband Story

21 Jan

It’s been a bleak day. The weather in Atlanta has been dreary. Many of the people I know are marching in protest of the President who was inaugurated yesterday. This, however, is a story about socks. Really great socks that make me happy every time I look at them.

When I was getting together my last minute things for the hospital while in labor, I picked out my favorite pair of socks to wear. I actually thought to myself, “Maybe they’ll be my lucky socks for labor.”

Once I was done with triage, the nurse had me put on super anti-slip, hospital-issued socks so that they wouldn’t get sued if I fell — I mean, so I wouldn’t fall. Because I was having contractions and my pelvis was still hurting from my huge belly (I hadn’t been able to comfortably put on a pair of socks or shoes for months), in an attempt to hurry I put the socks on over my lucky socks.

An hour later, while I was busy holding my newborn, the midwife or a nurse pulled off one soaked hospital sock in an effort to help me clean up. She didn’t realize that one half of my lucky sock pair was still inside said hospital sock. I had a brief thought that I could deal with that later, but alas, when I next thought about it, it was missing.

My husband, after our magic bonding hour with our new baby, spent a good 15 minutes donning gloves and digging through the biomedical waste baskets in an attempt to find my socks, which at this point had both gone missing. He found one, and I implored him to give up on the other, that it didn’t really matter.

Several days later, while at home, an Amazon box arrived at our door. It was a new box of Betsey Johnson socks (only the coolest socks ever), and the designs were even better than the socks I had had before. Some people might want diamonds for a push present, but this thoughtful gift from my husband means I now have seven lucky pairs of socks and a smile on my face whenever I look at my warm toes.

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Marriages Aren’t Easy: The Fable of the Incense Burner

10 Sep

But if you’re lucky — and you work hard, yada yada yada — they’re good anyway.

The weekend of July 4th we got in a huge fight. It was one of the more difficult times in our marriage, with me being so sick and blaming David (I don’t get mad during labor, I get mad during first trimester!), David working all day and then going to work on the new house every night, us living with various parents and a 3 year old, all our stuff in boxes scattered around the house, and suddenly switching from battling 2-year infertility to dealing with medical bills and un-Godly nausea… Let’s just say it all came to a head that holiday weekend. Why is it that vacations are often good times to get sick or in a fight?

While we weren’t speaking to each other, and we had just moved back in to the house for the second time, I went to buy incense to try to get rid of the horrible, poisonous smell of the house that apparently no one else could smell (thank you first trimester). I came back home and mentioned to Dave that I didn’t have any way to burn it, and without comment he then went and made an incense burner for me.

This is how I know I married a good man.

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I had no idea what he was sawing in the basement — I rarely force myself to go down there because it is very messy and dirty — prepping that 1,700 sq ft space for habitation will certainly be another fun, multi-weekend project! The loud noise made me curious (obviously), but I was patient (which is unlike me). He then came upstairs with a piece of wood with a hole cut at just the right angle and a groove for all the ash. It was hard not to feel loved, even if the fight wasn’t resolved yet.

Walter loves burning incense too since that’s one of the many fun things he learned to do at his Nini’s house. He also made me a burner later with this play-doh-like toy he has. Like father, like son, and I’m glad about that!

We found some real history

1 Oct

I call her my cousin. She is my husband’s cousin on his mother’s stepbrother’s side. But hey, everyone is family if they connect by blood or marriage in the South.

Katye, Fin, Walt, and I took her to the Atlanta History Center to visit the Swan House and the Smith Family Farm. Apparently her Great-Grandfather was wealthy on the East end of town (down by us!), and after we mentioned this to the 1930’s historical interpreter, we found him in the 1933 phone book they have sitting in the Swan House’s phone room! (Any decent mansion of course has a phone room.) It was incredible! All my little history-graduate cells were bursting with excitement at the find!

Mary Kate visits - Chas Shepard 1933

It listed his occupation and his wife’s name, plus his son was listed below them, as a student. It really brought them alive. Unfortunately, they aren’t technically related by blood to Walter, but sometimes marriage is thicker than water too.

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I love that when I suggested the Atlanta History Center as our “tourist” activity for the day, she said “Heck yeah! I love stuff like that!”

Later in the evening she and her husband came over for dinner at our house. We had a blast and chatted until late in the evening. That is one of my favorite parts of marriage: the awesome new family you can acquire. Luckily her husband comes to Atlanta often for business, so the next time she can join him I’m taking her to the Margaret Mitchell House.

#LongLiveLove

2 May

The past two weekends I have been grateful to live some extraordinary experiences. Two weekends ago Dave and I were witness to two great friends getting married. Not only are they awesome, creative people, but the bride is Indian, and I got to experience my first Indian wedding. I am totally converted. I am also convinced that if you want a dance party, there better be Indian music playing. It’s better than booze to get people going.

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They had two events at the Howard House, which is right around the corner from us.

Everything about the weekend was extraordinary. Even the rain didn’t slow us down. Friday night was Mehndi night, which is typically when the bride and other female family members get henna on their hands (and feet). However, since it took the bride 7 hours, she had hers done the day before. But any guest could get henna, and it was so much fun. I had mine for about one minute before the groom smudged one of my fingers. I only gave him a little bit of grief about it since it was his big day.

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My father-in-law is convinced it’ll stay forever. I wish!

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I love all the color!

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Best Indian food ever, and at a wedding too! I suspect it’s because the bride and groom are foodies (as well as graphic designers and musicians). You can only imagine the party they threw. The first night was a wedding in itself, and then the real weddings — they had two — were the next day!

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I love that they’ve been friends since they were Walter’s age.

My only regret was not getting a sari to wear. I was colorful enough, but next time I will be all over that. Because there will be more Indian parties in my future.

Walter was, while we were gone, staying at home with our next door neighbor.  She is a kindergarten teacher nearby and really sweet, so I figure it’s almost like paying a tutor too! Walter still tells me, “I have fun with Julie.” I love it.

We got to cuddle in the mornings though.

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Saturday was both the Indian ceremony in the morning, which we did not attend, and the American ceremony in the evening followed by a reception at Piedmont Park. Where, of course, Back Street Boys was blaring in the background across the lake during the very emotional ceremony (yes, I did cry). There was also a little Scottish flair thrown in there as well, and when they spoke their own vows — during a Methodist ceremony — they were actually quite great. The food buffet was amazing, and they had cakes (with the icing on top drawn by the henna artists from the night before) from Murphy’s, where I am going immediately to buy another one because those bites were the closest thing to heaven you can imagine.

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We were seated with Alex’s cousins, near the bride and groom table. We were flattered, and also Alex’s family is really cool. During the ceremony we sat next to Ruby’s cousin Prnay, who danced an ancient Indian dance, during the Mendhi night shindig, that he has spent years studying. When Ruby started crying, so did I! The fathers of the bride and groom also spoke wonderfully at the reception, both with humor and wisdom. It was a weekend full of awesome people, and I loved it.

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#rubyandalex #longlivelove

The Party

7 Mar

Last Sunday we went to an old friend’s wedding kick-off event. It was a small group of really cool people our age, hosted by a really cool group of adults our parents’ age that all live in Ansley Park. We hired a babysitter for the night, a very sweet girl who lives literally across the street from us. This was the second time Walter has had a paid babysitter (besides preschool), and I have to say, it makes me feel like a grown up. Even though I haven’t babysat since Walter was born, it is an weird feeling to pay someone to do what you used to do for money.

Being around lots of other happy couples (mostly other couples had been invited) made me terribly glad that David has loved me so long. 6 1/2 years so far. It is incredibly powerful to know that someone has chosen to love you through thick and thin, no matter what, and then live up to that challenge. He’s from the hill people of Scotland. He sticks around and puts up a fight.

My only other relationship that has lasted longer than with my husband — besides with my parents and siblings and a few school friends — is with my cell phone number. I’m pretty sure I could make a legal case if someone tried to take that number from me. You’ve been able to reach me at that number since I was 16 — when I got my first cell phone. Man was that thing a giant, and all it did was call and text. I miss that.

For a while we had a second phone line growing up. It ran into the guest bedroom and was somewhat my dad’s number, but we all used it. One night as we were eating dinner, we let the machine pick up, and we heard “Hello, hello, are you there?” in what we thought was my late grandmother’s voice. Caller ID: unknown number.

I was chatting with a new friend at the party, and he was talking about how he had known his girlfriend since they were ten, but they just recently started dating. But the best part for him was that since they had known each other for so long, they didn’t have to get past the “representative”. He said something like, “That’s the worst part of dating. For the first couple months you meet someone’s representative, and then you finally get to know them.” And while I instantaneously thought that was true, I also realized that I think that’s what I’ve been doing for myself lately. Getting rid of my own representative. It’s as if a filter is shedding, and I am becoming free.

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Polaroids rock. So does this group of awesomeness. These guys have been friends since they were Walter’s age. And they have great arm candy now too.

And speaking of people that are awesome, have I mentioned lately how much I love Walter? Every day is an brand new experience of love like I never thought it could be. He’s absolutely my favorite person in all the world.

A Wedding in Rome

24 Nov

This weekend I had the pleasure of witnessing and celebrating the wedding of one of my good Georgia Tech friends. I had never been to Rome, Georgia, and I have to say it was really a nice place. A quaint downtown, which I love, and the reception was at The Farm, which was even more of a drive, but well worth it.

Because we had another friend we hadn’t seen in two and a half years who lived in Rome, we drove up a little early and had lunch with him at Harvest Moon Cafe. The food was incredible and the company even better.

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It’s really nice to get back in touch with a friend and to instantly remember why you liked said friend so much. I also felt the same way seeing all my Georgia Tech friends again, most of whom are busy like we are or have moved out of state, so I either haven’t seen them in months or years. I blame the quickness of time for why so much of it passes by before I get a chance to meet up with friends.

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The Catholic service was very lovely and interesting. I thought the homily was short and meaningful — and funny! — and since the bride is Hispanic, they incorporated some of those traditions into the ceremony as well, which I enjoyed. I feel like no matter what your religious beliefs, you can always appreciate the cultural diversity of attending someone else’s service.

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We arrived at the reception venue and it didn’t disappoint.

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We did a quick photo shoot before it got dark.

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And then the fun began! A delicious dinner, drinks, and dancing into the night.

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Cupcakes. Yum.

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It was really nice to have this opportunity to spend so much time with people that I basically grew up with and used to hang out with every day (and their significant others). It felt good to be silly and just simply have a lot of fun together!

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There was an awesome bonfire in a nearby pasture after the festivities. It looked like they cut up an entire tree to make it. I wanted to stay til all the flames died, but we had to get home at some point that evening!

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I love fire.

Everything about the whole day was just extremely wonderful. Congrats to my friends! May they live long and happy lives together!

We left the baby and the Bible but brought the bourbon

27 Oct

Last weekend we had the pleasure of going on our church retreat in Black Mountain, North Carolina. I haven’t been on an overnight retreat since high school, and it was very fun to include alcohol in the mix. The weather couldn’t have been more perfect, and to be honest, I really enjoyed that it wasn’t too churchy. We had one session per day that lasted a couple hours, and it was more like Christian and life philosophy and discussion with 60 of my favorite people. I could have sat there chatting the whole weekend if the chairs had been more cushy.

Walt let us sleep in Friday morning, so we got a late start driving up there as we had chores to do before we could drop him off at my mom’s, and we also wanted to enjoy David’s day off work. The drive up to Asheville and beyond was gorgeous, though about halfway there David realized we hadn’t remembered to bring a Bible for the retreat. But we had made sure to have homemade snacks, wine, and bourbon! I have no doubt my priorities were clearly thought through. And of course we stopped for boiled peanuts as soon as we made it to the country.

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This guy’s Cajun-style peanuts were so good we stopped here on the way home too — in the front yard of the ACE Country Store up somewhere outside of the city.

We were going to arrive too late to make it to dinner at the lodge, so we stopped at Juicy Lucy’s in Asheville for a burger. They stuff their burgers with cheese (yum) and had great draft beer. It really felt like we were on vacation.

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We arrived at the lodge just as the first session was over, which was disappointing because it was about happiness, and I can always benefit from learning more about that. But we found our room, opened a bottle of wine, and sat out on rocking chairs on the front porch with good friends and a mountain breeze.

Our room, unfortunately, had two twin beds that were more similar to concrete slabs than to mattresses, and they were squeakier than a mouse being chased by a cat. This amused me since it was our first trip out of town without Walter (no sharing our room with a baby!), but we survived. Not all trips need to be super luxurious, just like they don’t have to be across the world to be interesting.

After lunch the next day we had lots of free time, which most people use to go hiking in the area. This was the main reason I didn’t want to bring a two-year-old (aka a slightly disobedient toddler), besides the fact that Dave and I seriously needed some adult-only time together. Our group walked a few miles from our lodge to the top of a cliff on Lookout Mountain, via a trail nearby. And we were greatly rewarded for our hiking efforts!

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The 360 views were spectacular.

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Saturday night they brought in a local storyteller. I thought half of her stories were really good. The last one really riled the kids up about a bear who liked to eat out of the nearby dumpster.

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On the way home Sunday we stopped again in Asheville for lunch at another yummy place, Wayside Village. Then of course back through the mountains and roadside art of North Georgia.  I thought this sign in particular showed a good sense of humor.

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I wanted to stop at every flea market, thrift store, and art stand on the way back, but we were in a hurry to get home to Walt. So we only stopped at one where this guy painted old window frames with rural scenes. I didn’t buy anything but I loved his art. I’ll have to get something next time.

Why sharing a grapefruit is like being married

29 Mar

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Me: I’m sorry I can’t cut grapefruit into two equal halves

Dave: Of all the things to not do well in the world, that’s not a bad one

Me: We’ll have to do that thing where we each eat half of the halves so we get the same amount

Dave: You should just take the bigger half

Me: I want to, but then I’d feel bad